Getting Out

No creases, just a gentle bump
or hung hangers strategically in
a steamy bath; two-minutes to
brush, my exposed brown tones
attract every corner's breeze AND
each chill reminds me of my rush,
as I stride effortlessly...away...

Fleet-footed rainbow dancing,
with cool breeze encouragement
firmly UPON MY BACK;
I stride
effortlessly...
towards you...

Made A Decision

I made a decision, even though

it was probably already made;

but since I've decided to move

forward, past thoughts intrude

my present-day thinking.



I made a decision, even though it was

probably already made; but since

then, looking forward has lead me

back to reasons why I had yet do

to so.



I made a decision, even though it

was probably already made;

but since then, my heart pounds

through my chest; rest-filled nights

are quasi-sleepless, still...



I will not turn around.

In My Hands...

"Success demands that we
regulate our impulses..."
Self-regulation is my power,
My hero complex...

So my hope for a normal life
lies in my hands, much like
the lives I attempt to save, to change,
to deliver from the scars of others;
I stand alone against the tide,
embracing the wrath of mostly
never seen villains, for when they
are afoot, I reside in the shadows,
awaiting their poor decisions that
make my choices for me; placing
your life in my hands.

As I enter the crime scene, mental notes
are observed, not taken, for far too
much has been removed from you...
My mission is to return the smile to
your heart, filling your body with
the fire you never knew existed,
had dismissed as a little girl's wish,
or have been afraid of...the wonders
of the unknown terrifies the victim's
mind, crippling her heart, so rebuilding
is not an option...my technique involves
stealth-like behaviors that ignite
an obsession to be fulfilled...and
this obsession is placed in my hands.

My internal struggles, these insatiable impulses,
establish my objectives...
I aspire to identify with the brokenness,
weakness, sorrows and pity...in an effort
to help restore balance to a broken life;
Reuniting your body with the shadows
of your mind, the memories of tomorrow
are now in my hands, for today's experiences
will create such vivid dreams which will replay
over and over until it is reality...

Sleepy Eyes

I have always wondered why eyes itch before
you go to sleep. It is obviously an early indicator
that babies are in need of a nap when their
moods change and they begin to
rub their eyes. This is true up unto adulthood...
at least it is true for me. I begin
to zone out and can be a little irritable
(unknowingly of course) and my eyes
will text my hands, with a request for a gentle
yet firm rub. As we all know,
eyes are very sensitive and once these manly,
strong yet soft
(it's okay to laugh, I toot my horn for fun)
hands caress these eyelids, a gentle moisture
forms and at times, leak out of the
corners.
[Too much fun with words? Maybe :-)]

I enjoy this feeling, this yearning of the eyes for the
touch of my hands, the itchy feeling that desires to be
massaged. It is an indicator that I have exhausted enough
fuel throughout the day and it is getting close to the time
when I need rest. It is the signs of the a new beginning...
an end to another great day that always leads to the
endless possibilities of tomorrow.

Small cuts, knee scraps, and some other injuries itch as well
when healing. This is also a welcomed state of being that I
associate with sleepy eyes. The body heals better with sleep.
So if I'm hurt, feeling down or under the weather, sleepy
itchy eyes are the beginning to a better tomorrow.

Look at me

Standing on the bridge of Hope,
I plunged into the river of Destiny...
Currently floating as a feather in air,
Gaze with carefree toddler eyes,
Wishing, never to awake from a daydream.

Stars being caught by a horizon,
My chest embraces the wind's song,
As my back grows cucumber eyes...
I resist all temptation, unless it calls my name.

Screaming from a mid-ranged cliff,
I released my passion of forgotten songs...
Divulging all through colorless eyes (Now look at me);
Retiring from a lifetime...I may begin again...

Before Anything Starts...

The following poem uses familiar ideals to express strong emotions to relate the idea of how situations can get out of hand, especially situations involving experiences and people that we are passionate about...including ourselves.


How many times is too many,
when it seems your heart and mind have never agreed?
What do you do, when you don't know what to do,
and every feeling you've ever had feels untrue?
Is it fair to say, that everything in love plays,
on how very different your words and actions
reveal exactly what you didn't want to say?

What is the purpose of hurting for love?
Is it the example that came from above?
The war between good and evil was hinged,
on unconditional love that humans still seem to not comprehend?
(Giving what is most precious without the slightest ulterior motive,
only to express your love and the lengths you will go for that love)
Or is it the glutinous for punishment that we see exhibited by
Adam and Eve's inability to resist the sweet taste of a fruit that was
forbidden from the sky?

Why do we ask questions that we think we want to know the answers to,
when actually, we're searching for a hope of a reality that we desire desperately to be true?
(No one likes rejection...the truth hurts,
sadly it is needed so that relationships and
situations are not based on a false reality)

Is it so hard to believe that a lie was told, in hopes not to hurt?

Or is it easier to point the judgemental finger

because you're the one that got hurt?

What is the answer to the questions that have no real answers?

For example, will I be a famous composer, singer, or dancer?
(No one can predict the future...yet we are hurt when honest, maybe tactless answers are given. We all yearn to be inspired by the ones we love and want to be an inspiration as well)

These are aspirations, such as one for peace of mind or reparations
for all the heartache, pain and suffering, tactless rants and
arguments over fabrications.
"Everybody knows that nobody really knows, how to make it right..." (J. Legend)
So why give it one more try when you are still hurting deep inside?

Wanting something you think you need is so inconsiderate of one's own heart,
Seems like more should be considered before anything ever starts.

Success Part II: The Slide Shows of Life

Decisions, decisions, decisions...mistakes, mistakes, mistakes...lessons, lessons, lessons...

From an early age, each person in the world has to learn that every decision made has a consequence. Whether we are treated or punished, decisions must be made. On the road to success (remember, the individual defines his/her success), the choices made may not always be interpreted as good ones, even if the choice is made with the best interests in mind.

Upon hearing this song for the first time many moons ago, I was drawn to John Legend's soulful voice and the words that he sang. I immediately thought of my life and all of the ups and downs that I have experienced. Hip-hop artist and businessman Clifford "T.I." Harris paints a vivid picture of his beginnings, from his childhood aspirations to acquire wealth to his decisions to become a successful artist. Along the way, he encountered several life-changing experiences, ones that have earned him extended incarcerated stays within the state. Still, just like anyone, when adversity arrived at his doorstep, he had opportunities to make decisions to begin new paths in life and to end old ones, which his last two albums have elaborated on, as well as his reality show (not a shameless plug I assure you). T.I. is quoted as saying, "I've learned just to do things. Courage comes from adversity once you go through it". For me, courage seems to be an important key to success and during the video, you can see courage displayed as T.I. continued working and trying to help others even though he had been sentenced with another stay with the state.

I dare not compare myself or my life experiences to those of the aforementioned artist, but like him, I have faced seemingly countless adverse situations that were the consequences of my own decisions, as I'm sure my readers have as well. Some may speculate upon the reasons behind the choices made by categorizing them as immature actions, selfishness, stubbornness or ignorance, etc. Yet, in every one's mind at the time that a decision is made and a mistake develops and a life lesson begins, the reality of the situation is quite clear and the reasoning for that decision may seem very logical.

Everyone has heard the saying, "hindsight is 20/20" and if we could see a slide show of our lives we could observe and remember things that may not have been as clear before. Luckily, we can choose to reflect (be careful not to ponder too long) on situations once we have gotten out of them to discover the lessons we must learn so that we will not make the same mistakes twice. This is the secret path of acquiring wisdom, which I'm sure you will agree is essential to success.

My dad told me once, "when the unexpected occurs, that's not the time to be emotional. Think...'how am I going to deal with this situation'? Then, get your plan together and follow through with your plan. Once you are in the clear, then you can look back on it (view your slide show) and react how you want: jump up and down, cry, laugh or whatever." Seems like a good recipe for success to me...