I Don't Know Why

This is a poem written after seeing
an awkward hug between father and son.
I attempted to create a voice of the son who
immediately walks away, trying to rationalize
what just happened...

Seeing hands raises for consequences
morphed my motion sensors overtime;
then one day I cringed when my True
Love pounced towards me in glee...I'm not
super sensitive but that was her reason
for leaving...I don't know why, but
I blamed myself for that.

Reaching out with my heart, I released
the words "I Love You," only to receive a
retreating quick mumble of "I love you too."
I would stare for a bit...wondering was it not
okay to say these words...I'm not super sensitive
but that was the reason I gave myself for
retreating internally...I don't know why, but
I blamed myself for that.

Getting a much needed hug was bittersweet,
for I fought to extend the embrace for a larger
exhale; so many emotions filled me,
I thought I would finally explode with a verbal
expression of how my life was made so much
better from this gesture...but I fought in vain,
for the hug only lasted about the length of a
handshake...He pulled away...from me, it seems--
I'm not super sensitive but that
had to be the reason I set myself up for this
disappointment...I don't know why, but
I blamed myself for that.